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Welcome to design for the creative mind, a podcast for interior designers and creative entrepreneurs to run their business with purpose, efficiency and passion. Because, well, every design is different, the process should remain the same. Prepare yourself for some good conversations with amazing guests, a dash of Jesus and a touch of the woowoo and probably a swear word or two. If you're ready to stop trading your time for money, and enjoy your interior design business. You are in the right place. I'm your host, Michelle Lynn.
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Welcome back, everybody. This is Michelle Lynn, for the designed for the creative mind Podcast. I'm super excited. And I know I say that on a regular basis. But today, I'm really excited to introduce you to do Charles. And for over 18 years, Jude has been producing documentaries for entrepreneurs. He has produced stories for Google, Steve Harvey, and dozens of visionary CEOs. Jude is the author of dramatic demonstration. This is a book. And it's actually a roadmap that teaches you how to dig deep to find compelling stories that no one else knows. And then leverage those stories to grow your business. Jude's mission is to lead and empower entrepreneurs to have relentless, unwavering courage. Jude, welcome. Thanks for being here. Michelle,
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thank you for having me. It's it's a long time coming. But I am excited to share and geek out about storytelling. As you know, it's something I'm passionate about talking about. So yeah, definitely looking forward to.
1:56
You're so darn good at it.
1:58
Yeah. Thank you. Thank you.
2:00
Definitely practice what you preach. All right. Well, June, so we met. Was it in? It was in Vegas. I think it was just this past summer. So we're recording this in March. So I've known you for less than a year. But I feel like every time that we cross paths, it's just such a lovely, authentic, just present conversation. So if y'all don't know who Jude is, you need to make sure that you get plugged into his little, this little. But what was the word I was looking for? earlier? We were talking about
2:37
like you were looking for ecosystem? I think it's a good system.
2:40
I did I did. I did. Yes. ecosystem. That's what you need to do is y'all need to y'all need to go stop June. I'm going to hold you hostage until the end of this conversation. And then that's where he's going to share. You can you can find him. So do the last time I saw you. We were going into the holidays. We were in Florida. And you were taking December off. Yeah. I just I want to start this conversation for our audience with the fact that you intentionally take two months off a year. Do you want to just touch on that real quick. And then we'll kind of dive into the storytelling step because this is just, I want you all to listen, because it's I think it's game changing in an entrepreneurs, lifestyle and health, mental health, physical health, all the things. So
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for context, I have taken two months off every year since 2013. I have been in business 18 years now. But I originally started in 2013 where it was November, December, but I was second off and then 2020 October of 2020. I woke up one morning, my teeth were clenched heart racing, my eyes open, but I could not physically move my body. And this lasted for two hours. And ultimately what ended up happening is that I was diagnosed with burnout, depression and anxiety. So November December breaks turned into June and December breaks because it gave me a better cadence of four working five months and then taking one month off and then working another five months taking one month off versus racing to the end of the year. Now why do I take these two months off though? I think that's probably more important because I started doing it. Two things. I started doing it before I could afford it. And two, I started doing it before burnout. Why is because I'm an introvert. And I'm very clear that although I do very high level work, I need time off to take a break to refresh myself to recuperate, to think about what the new year looks like, or what the next five months looks like for me. And so it's been incredibly important. We talked off camera that I even this past June when I came off my break I created a new law Offering that's been working really well, it's incredibly important to take that time off, take that break, so that I'm not just continuing to go down the rabbit hole of doing things I don't want to do. I asked myself very important, I asked myself very important questions during that break, to simplify, some of it is looking at my wins. Other parts of it is what do I want to stop doing that just doesn't feel good anymore? Doesn't? Maybe I tried something that it just didn't work out the way I thought it would work out. I take that time that full month to process that to not think about work.
5:36
So are you doing that prep before you go into your time off like examining your wins and what you want to avoid? Or are you doing that examination while you're off?
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I do the examination going into it is not as in depth. So I do I always think about my small wins throughout the week, like always look at the end of the week. Okay, what went right? What went wrong, right? And I'm looking at what do I celebrate? Because it's easy to beat yourself up, especially as a creative entrepreneur. But when I go on that time off, I am completely unplugged. So in December, this past December, where I where I took time off, I'm completely unplugged, not looking at social media, not looking at email. You know, not meeting with clients, not doing podcasts just completely unplugged from everything and focusing on the set of questions that I have. And going into it. Yeah, definitely prepare a little bit. But really, it's when I'm into it that I'm like, Okay, what did this last six months or five months really look like? And how do I like one of my most important questions is about the 8020 rule. And it's like, what was the I got 80% of the results. But what was the 20% that really led to this? Right. And something really cool came out of the last December one where I realize it wasn't just the 20% that that led to the 80% results, it was the extra 20% effort. So listening to that, it might you might think, oh, that's 40% know what it really is, when you do the math. It's actually just an extra 4% effort that led to the 80% of income results, however you want to categorize it.
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Yeah. So how has it changed your business? Like taking this time off? Because I would imagine, and y'all I'm going to introduce Jude, and we're going to talk about like, who he is and what his experiences. But I think this is applicable to anybody and everybody. But most voices at this point are saying I can't take two months off. Yeah, I can't afford that. Yeah, but I guess it impacted your business. Truthfully,
7:45
I could never see myself going into the future without ever taking this two month break. Again, remember, I did this before I could afford it. Right. And it was important for me to do it because I knew I needed time to think you don't get time to think as the leader of your business as a creative entrepreneur, you do not get time to think to slow down and think about what happens next. And I knew it was important for me. One of my core values is depth versus width. And it was important for me to go really deep, not just with my clients, but with myself to ask myself hard questions. And so what comes out, it's different each and every time. So like I told you June break, I had a new offering that has been working really well. December was more of just I needed to catch my breath. And so I needed to catch my breath. But I also needed to pay attention to what was actually working. Because since 2019, I made a very conscious decision to step out of the shadows I mentioned, I've been doing this business for 18 years, but the first 13 years I just did the work. I was not on podcast, I hadn't written a book. I hadn't put myself out there. I was not intentional about building a personal brand. I just did the work. Well, after four or five years of I, I've done a lot in four or five years on the personal brand side, like writing a book doing an audio book. I mentioned I mentioned to you off camera, I have a story bank journal. I've been on over 150 podcasts within the last three years. And so there's a lot and I've been speaking with one of the last time we saw each other I was speaking at Luann live and it's so there's a lot that I've been doing that I needed to look at. Okay. This is great, but like what's actually working? Right? Right, and what makes me feel good, what makes me like, What do I want to continue doing? It feels good, right? And so, for me, the December break was about that. And that's why I said I looked at the 8020 and I looked at Wait, but it was really because of this one set thing that I've made. I was intentional about doing right that created the rest of the results that I've been having.
9:48
Dude, you can take four months off. Right, right.
9:52
And that's the power of it. When you really get to slow down and analyze you realize oh, I don't I don't need all these things I don't need To the extra, that were taught to need, right?
10:06
And that hustle mentality
10:08
in the hustle mentality, you don't need it. And I think one thing, so I've categorized it as a clarity of constraints. The more you build your business, the less constraints you put on yourself. Because it's just the more and more and more you have the resources now, so you just add more and more things. But there's actually a clarity that comes in constraints where you realize like, I could do more, but do I need to do more? Right. And it's not about playing a small game, I believe in playing a big game. But it's just how you play that game that really matters.
10:44
Well, that and what's important to you as well. So my, you know, funny coincidence is my husband and I just decided to sell our house, like out of the blue, because we have a, we have a 5200 square foot house, it sits on a creek. I mean, it's a badass house. And it was fantastic during the pandemic, because we had so much space and a little toddler running around. And then we were before I got new studio space, we were hosting clients in my dining room, because it's got this view, and just like all the things, and we were looking at each other, and we're just like, we don't need this. Like we do not look just because you can doesn't mean you need to. Yep. So let's scale back and just refocus on what's important. And it's not a big ass house. Yeah,
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and sometimes that biggest house can be a distraction. Yeah, it can be distraction, and it uses up more resources, exactly the more resources and then you need to. And so again, that's why I feel like it's so critically important to take this time off, you don't need to take two months off. I recommend to most people at the very least take three weeks off at one time. Because the first week you're going to spend decompressing where you're trying to figure out your bearings and like you're used to are you routine? Yes. But the second and third week is where the magic really happens. And at the very least, I recommend for every entrepreneur to take three weeks off. We have a good friend Heather, who when I mentioned it to her, she immediately took time off and went to Naples. I think it was for a few days, but it changed so much for her right. And so yeah, I'm a big advocate for it. You don't need too much. I personally take too much just because I know that's what I need. But you have to decide what you need. It's more than two weeks. But it doesn't have to be two months.
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I agree. I we we've since I've started my business. We've closed the business for two weeks, every December. And you know, that's a good jumping off point. But you're right that first week. I'm like, oh, I need to do this. Oh, I forgot to do that. Oh, I need to do this by the end of the year. And then the next week is like your it's that last week of the year. You're like, I don't know what day it is. Yeah, I haven't gotten out of my pajamas. I'm full of cheese. So yeah, I think third weeks good. And then this, but this year in honor of Jude in June, I have marked every day as do not book. So whether I take time off, I'm just not booking myself.
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Yeah. Yeah, that's smart. Because my June is a slowdown too. It's not necessarily I'm not completely unplugged in June. It's just more of a slowdown where I'm intentionally working. If I work, I might only work five hours that week. Right? So it is because and truthfully after so many years of doing it is still hard. I think I'm on my 10th year of doing it. I think that's right, it's still pretty hard to take to completely unplug, especially when you're so used to going and love what I do. Right? Right. And when you love what you do, it's it's it's not something that comes easy. It's not something that comes natural, but it is so necessary. So important. Really quick, I just pulled it up while we were talking. And I want to go over some of the questions if you have some time for that. So like so I'll go over the there's four different sections. First section is big wins. So I'll ask myself, what projects did you work on this year? What were your biggest accomplishments? So I happen to do video production. So what were your biggest accomplishments in video production? What were your biggest accomplishments in business development? And then what was your biggest accomplishment and personal development? So this is not all just for work? I'm looking at who I am as a person as well, as
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entrepreneurs, our personal and our professional selves are so intertwined. Yep. You have to you have to work.
14:39
You have to learn how to separate you have to learn how to separate them. Part of the reason I burned out in 2020 is because I had gotten so used to doing that no longer learned how to be.
14:49
Oh, that's a good one. Yes. And we are human beings, not human doings.
14:54
Yes, yes. And so that's why it's important to exit yourself some of these codes. Questions. And then I, I asked what was the 20% work that produced the 80% of the results? Where didn't you do well? What are the business challenges? The current business challenges? Were the current personal challenges? Did you accomplish your goals from the last five months or a year? In then I will ask, what are your new goals for the next half of the year? And then what is it going to take for you to personally accomplish these goals? Oh, that's good, right? Because I think we it's easy to just set goals, but then that think about with these goals I've set, what is it going to take for me? What is the mindset I need to have? Who do you have to be? Who do you have to be? Who do you have to be in order to account? And then so what happens with that second question is that I can then give myself permission to remove some of these goals, because I may not be it may require too much of me in that season. Right? So accomplish that goal.
15:58
I think that's important, dude. Let's take that down for a moment is you can have a goal. But it doesn't have to be today's goal. It doesn't even have to be this year's goal. You can, you can earmark that for a time that feels more in line with who you want to be. Yeah. Yeah.
16:18
So they fail. Now, Michelle hasn't seen this list what comes right after the goals. And what I just talked about is the final section future vision. And in that section is where I take the goals that I may have crossed off, and I'll ask myself, what if questions.
16:35
I'm psycho, I mean, psychic.
16:38
That's like, oh, but definitely, it's like, that's what you can dream. Yeah, that's where you can dream. And it may not be a goal, like you said, it may not be a goal that you can accomplish, you know, within a year or last six months, or next six months. But it's a goal that you can accomplish in five years. It doesn't mean you completely remove it, just because it may not be possible right now is just like, Okay, what if, what if it is possible? What if there's something else that changes that makes this possible, right? And so yeah, it's, I take the time, I believe there's 20 questions here. But I take the time to really dig deep. Ask myself these questions. And what happens is that I continue to build and grow a stronger business. There's two different offerings I have now in my business, I didn't always the first 10 years, I had just one six figure offering. So if someone wanted to work with me, I only worked with five clients a year and I charged over $100,000 that came from I didn't start like that. But that came from my sabbaticals from taking the time off. Right, analyzing where was I making more profit analyzing? How did I enjoy working with clients? Where did I want to niche down I wasn't always in a niche when I first started, but I going through these questions, taking myself through this experience, is how it helped me reach to that point where I could charge $100,000 plus per project.
17:59
Designers, that's something that we can compare to as well. Would you want? Would you rather have 10 $10,000 design fees? Or would you rather have $100,000 design project? Yeah, I can tell you what I want. Yep. Yeah. Yeah. And
18:14
it's in one of, I don't think it was in December, but it was in June, I think I thought of, or might have been less, two years ago to summer. But I even wrote down like, what, what if I could charge one client a million dollars? What would that look like for a million dollar project? Right? It doesn't mean I'm doing it now. But
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even look like? What would it look like? And I give myself permission to dream that? Right?
18:39
So yeah, it's, I can't highly recommend it enough. It's something that again, I just will always do for the rest of my life no matter what I do next. Because I do look at what came out of this is that I retire after 20 years of doing one thing, I've been doing video production for 18 years, and I look at, okay, after you're 20 stepping away, what does that look like? What
19:03
do I want to be when I grow up?
19:07
What I want to be when I grow up, and it's a it's just it's so critically important as creatives to dig this deep matches, do the work, but to understand who you are at the same time, too.
19:18
And you do that when you give yourself whitespace it's just like a room, you you cannot have something where your eye lands on every single space in the room. You have to have a place to breathe. Yep. So that makes sense. Well, I was very inspired by your conversation. When I we saw you in November. Was it November, it was November it was the fall. And to definitely make sure that I'm taking time for myself and so June will be the first one and then of course will be closed. And December better. Might be taking the whole month. We'll see. Let's so I think we'll we'll come Back to this because I think the conversation kind of revolves around it. But let's take a step back and as a video producer, the the documentaries that you produce, so how did you get started in that? And how do you serve interior designers? As you know, that's y'all I met I met Jude through Luann. So y'all know Luanne negara has a well designed business. So let's just, let's just take the lady who leads and Jude works for her worked for Are you still working with the working mother? Yeah, just that ongoing documentary forever. That
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documentary, just some other ongoing work marketing efforts, but the documentary were produced in 2022, for a full year, followed her for eight months. Behind the Scenes of her story, starting the podcast.
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Y'all probably saw him following him around at market. Yep.
21:02
I was at High Point market twice. I was at Vegas market. Yeah, just flying all over the place with Lewin and filming that. How I got started, though, was I was 17 years old in a TV production classroom. And I had a teacher, Mrs. Donnelly, who taught me everything that she knows about video production. And then I'll never forget on May 4 2006, Mrs. Donnelly says to me, dude, you're really talented at Video Production, you should start a business. Now, Michelle, are you baby, I was just a baby. I'm the youngest of 10. So not only just a baby, but also the baby of my family, the baby. And my father was a construction worker, my mom worked at a cheer factory. I had no entrepreneurs in my family, no one to model. So I had no idea what it meant to be an entrepreneur. But the following day, May 5 2006, Mrs. Donnelly walked into the classroom. And she handed me a yellow envelope. And I was like, What is this? She's like, look inside. When I looked inside, Michelle, it was my very first set of business cards, which I still have to this day. Oh, sitting on my desk. That's how I got started in theater production. But like I mentioned, I wasn't always sure.
22:14
A teacher a teacher. What an impact. Yeah, yeah. And
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I tell her all the time, I still speak to Mrs. Donnelly and I tell her all the time, I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing had sheen that had the faith, the belief in me to not only just tell me to start a business, but she went and bought my first set of business cards. And so I wasn't always doing documentaries. I started by doing like birthday parties. Very small wedding. So if you can imagine $500 weddings. But it wasn't until I worked with a entrepreneur. Her name is Keisha Dior. And Keisha had, she wanted to do these vlog video series. And I was just like, Yeah, I don't want to do that. It's not my lane. What if we, and I pitched her the idea of doing a documentary, and she was like, she was four, she was game? Well, Michelle, Michelle, within one year of her of us doing this documentary, she had made $1 million from starting a cosmetic business, we found the behind the scenes of her doing this cosmetic business, wow, when he or she made a million dollars. And it was a lightbulb moment for me like, oh, this could be a niche, this could be a thing. Right? And that years later, 18 years later is led to me. All I do is create documentaries for entrepreneurs, specifically now for interior designers, helping them tell their story show their gift, and interior design. And it's not just about interior design. It's also about who you are as a human being as a person. What influences your design work. Who are you, as a mother as a father? Who are you as a leader, if you're leading a team of other designers, who are you as a leader? When you watch Lewin's documentary, if you haven't seen it yet, that's great. It is not just about her running the podcast, we get to see behind the scenes of her as a grandmother, as a mother and grandmother, who she is as a human being. And to me, that is my life's work that I've been doing the last 18 years. And that's what's led to me sitting here with you today. What's
24:13
so much fun, and you're so good at it the whole I've always heard well, not always but Donald Miller and his book, I think it's called Building a story brand. That was something that I read years ago, but you like I watched your social media, and I watched your documentary of Luann and even just our conversations, you are just the master of weaving stories into your into everything. Like seriously like into everything when I think I was gonna say into our conversations, but no, it's everywhere. And then that's your book is teaching people how to dig deep to find the compelling stories. Why? Why is this so important? In what we do As entrepreneurs,
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authenticity, we are more than the work that we do. And in order to be more than the work that you do is to show you need to show up authentically. And for me. I mentioned earlier that I made a conscious decision in 2019 to step out of the shadows. Part of that was being vulnerable, being open and vulnerable, who I am, how I've gotten to where I am today. What has influenced that over the years, when I went through burnout in 2020, it was not it was one of the most difficult seasons of my life, but when decision I made during that time is to be open about it. And in being open about it, it unlocked so much for other people. I remember the very first event I spoke at thing was 2021. And I spoke about burnout, it was a creative field for copywriters, and marketers. And I spoke about burnout. And I remember a lady walked up to me at the end. And she said to me, you know, I've I have been going through something never didn't really realize it until you talked about your journey and all the symptoms that you were having leading up to burnout. And she was like, thank you. Because you unlocked so much for me, you helped me see that I am going through burnout, I need to go see a therapist, because I talk about that as well how I saw therapists for two years. And for me, you cannot be your authentic self. If you're not sharing your story, if all you do as an interior designer is share the final design, you're not showing up authentically. There's so much more to you, you are a three dimensional human being. And it's important that we share the experiences to me stories are just simply experiences, the stories about a very specific moment in time. Right. And when you share those moments in time and how they have influenced your life or how they've helped you learn new lessons. That's how you and I can relate. That's why you and I have related is because of those stories.
27:03
Yeah, and I think that being vulnerable Brene Brown has just been you know, trailblazing for that. But it's it's something everybody has in common. And I think so many of us just hide behind that veneer of perfection it Oh, everything's fine, everything's fine. Everything's fine. When even when it's not, and social media is probably really just plagued the hell out of most of us for that. But the vulnerability has been such a game changer and my feeling of freedom. You know, when I just said screw this, like, this is not you know, I'm tired of trying to put on these pretentious airs of being an interior designer. I'm just gonna be weird the way I am. And you know, people will like it or they don't it's kind of like when I was dealing with like, you know, you like it or you lump it, buddy. It's such a, it's such a game changer. It feels like it should be, it feels scary. Because what if you're rejected, and our mind does not want that for us, but it has changed everything I think. Imagine trying to bake a cake without a recipe. You kind of know what the ingredients are, but you don't know how to put it all together. After lots of hard work and trying different combinations, all you are left with is a sticky situation and a stomachache behave. Running an interior design business can feel exactly that same way. That is why I created the interior design business bakery. This is a program that teaches you how to bake your interior design business cake and eat it too. If you don't want to figure out the hard way, and you want guidance to follow the recipe that has already been vetted, someone that has already been there and done it and will help you do it too. Then check out the year long mentorship and coaching program, the interior design business bakery. If your interior design business revenue is below 300,000. Or if you're struggling to make a profit and keep your sanity, this is the only program for you. You can find that information at designed for the creative mind.com forward slash business dash bakery. Check it out. You won't regret it
29:39
how do you know that you are sharing the right story? Because like you were talking about sharing your story, but there's so many different directions like how vulnerable do you get? Yeah,
29:54
it's a great question. The story's about a very specific moment in time and the law lesson that you learned in that lesson, the lesson should always relate back to your business in some way. When I talk about burnout, when I talk about the experiences I've had through burnout, for example, September of 2021, I happen to drive to a grocery store. And as I was getting out the car running, not running, but walking to the front door of this grocery store, I hear a loud bang to my left. And when I look over, it is a Tesla car sitting on top of another car. Oh,
30:37
very good.
30:40
So I immediately run over. And there's these two guys standing outside. There's a woman and her husband trapped inside of this Tesla that's sitting on top of another car. And I'm like, Did anyone call 911? And the two guys don't respond. And I'm like, Did anyone call 911? Well, I ended up calling 911. But guys didn't answer. And what ultimately ended up happening is that yesterday lady and her husband was stuck inside their car. But there were actually three other people trapped in the car that she was on top of that I didn't notice. Until fire trucks, you know, started trying to take care of everything, firefighters started trying to take care of everything. But the purpose of that story is that in September 2021, I mentioned that I burned out in October 2020. Well, I had felt worthless in September 2021. When I went to that grocery store, I remember what I was thinking in the sense like, Well, who am I if I can't work, the way that I used to work, because I prided myself on the fact that I could work really hard and get through difficult moments. So I was like, who am I? And that moment showed me that in the heat of the moment, I am that person that comes in and is completely calm. And it's not about me doing the work. I happen to tell great stories, and I happen to do video production, but it was about who I am as a human being that made it possible for these other people to be safe. Right? Right, the lesson I teach at the end of that, so I share that story on Instagram, if you want to see the story, if you want to see the picture, because it really did happen. It's It's kind of crazy to see, you want to see the pictures on Instagram. But the lesson at the end is to learn how to be versus doing, you are so much more than your work, right. And that's how I show up in my work. That's how I show up with my clients. And so the lesson at the end of your story, is when you know you're telling the right story, you don't want to tell a story for the sake of telling a story, you want to tell the story for the lesson, you do a really good job at this yourself. Because I've noticed you there's two things you do really well. One, you share the story vulnerably. But you also reshare that story over and over the story of your daughter. And again, it's not just simply you're sharing it just to be vulnerable, you're sharing it, because it's important to the work that you do with not only interior design, but in coaching others as well is so critically important, right? Because here's something that you have dealt with. Here's what it really translates to and why the lesson is so important. When we as human beings go through challenges, how do you respond to those challenges?
33:16
And everybody's so different. Yeah.
33:18
And everybody's so different. But knowing how you respond to it makes me want to follow you more, because it's like, oh, I wouldn't have responded that way. But knowing that Michelle did or knowing that Judy responded this way, in this difficult moment. Actually, maybe I want to be a little bit more like them. Right? When your clients hire you, they're not hiring you just because you can design that's a given, if you're an interior designer, you should hopefully be able to design they're hiring you for is to be able to lead them through their projects. And how can you show me that you can lead? It is through telling me about these moments, these difficult moments that have happened in your career, even if it's a short one year career, there's a way that you do things that no one else does it. And that's what you ultimately want to communicate in the way that you tell stories. It's the story, the moment in time, and the lesson that you learned in that moment in time.
34:12
I love that in my paid program, the interior design business bakery. Our first module is, you know, what makes you unique, like who are you what makes you a badass, and then you have to get the and then you have to share that. Which is usually pretty difficult for us to begin with because it's just like, Oh, I'm just me, I'm not really a badass, I just blah blah, blah, because these are the things that we take for granted. Dude, I'd probably need to get your book and put that in the curriculum required reading. But then it's like and then how do you share that through your social channels and through so many other other platforms? But taking that and taking yourself and creating the stories and the lessons really does have an edge to it. That sets you apart, you know, your, like, unique selling proposition or whatever, but you are your unique selling proposition.
35:06
Yeah, you exactly. And I couldn't have said it better you are your unique selling proposition, the value is you, we hear all the time that we should be tell, we should be giving more value or sharing tips and tricks. And it's like, that's not the value. The value is you, you as the person as a human being the value is you. And it is up to you to find your magic to find your superpower, as Luann likes to talk about it, that helps your clients, right, because the design, I said, and for me the video business, or doing video production, that's just a tool. I could be doing anything. And it's still about who I am as the person that shows up. And so when you are telling your stories, how do you know you're sharing the right story? It's a story that leads to a lesson. And that lesson helps to communicate the real value that you bring to your projects.
36:00
I love that. And just Yeah, and who you are. Because that design. But I'd love you know, I'd love to say that my designs or my team's designs are just elevated are they're better than or whatever. But they're not. I mean, we are all beautiful designers in our own right. But our clients hire us. Yeah, they. So you're exactly right, what differentiates us, it's not just the photos, it's how we deliver our message. And they want to feel special and heard. Well, okay, so you brought up the story about my daughter, and I am always kind of talking about her and how she's impacted what I do now. But how do you share your personal life without oversharing? In business? Like, I have to go back and sometimes edit my, my, my social posts like, oh, better delete that.
36:51
Yeah, I you know, it's a it's a slippery slope. There's balance. And I think you do have to decide on the beginning, what are you not willing to share? What are you not willing to talk about?
37:02
That's probably the better way to go at it is eliminating? Yeah,
37:06
and I, I know, there are some designers who, you know, their kids are off limits, they won't talk about their kids, they won't talk about, you know, what goes on in that part of their lives. But I think vulnerability doesn't have to just be about the intimate moments in your life. The personal things that you have decided this is off limits, vulnerability is about sharing your strengths. Vulnerability is about sharing the values that you have. So I mentioned at the beginning, one of my values is depth versus width. But I also have a value of adventure, and a value of storytelling, obviously, I have a value of freedom, choosing what client kind of clients I work with where I work. So there's four freedoms that I have. And then you know, there's, there's the values, there's a strengths, but then there's also the lessons, which we've already talked about. Give me an example of. So my core value is adventure. I'll give you an example of a story that I tell for adventure. For my 30th birthday. I got surprised with two tickets to go somewhere that I wanted to go. I had been talking about going for four years, but it never happened. And it was with my girlfriend at the time who she was just like, hey, wear some comfortable clothes. But we're going on a trip for your birthday. And I was like okay, I ended up driving, but I didn't know where I was driving to until we got to this small airport executive airport. And I realized we were going skydiving. Oh. So I am like kind of freaking out. We walk up to the counter and this lady hands us five pages of paperwork. And no line was show each of the five papers reminds you over and over you might die the plane they malefactor may malfunction as you go up in the air, your parachute may not come out. Like you might die and you have to sign over your life to say okay, even if I die, we're not gonna sue you or my family's not gonna sue you, right? And so as we're walking to the airplane, going up in the air, like all of that is a blur. All I remember is jumping out of this airplane with the instructor behind me because it was a time skydiving and just falling fast
39:25
to Holy cow.
39:29
Now ultimately, what ended up happening is, by the grace of God, we landed safely landed on two feet. All right, so that's just the story, which is a story about adventure how I ended that story. Normally, depending on where I share it, I normally share it in what I call, I do a session strategy session called roadmapping. And so how I share that in the end is that, you know, there's certain questions I'm going to ask you is going to be really deep and it's going to feel scary, almost as scary as jumping out of an airplane. But I need you to trust me that you're going to landed on two feet. Right? So I've decided that part of my value is adventure. I've decided that, okay, I'm willing to share this story, it was a similar story in my personal life, it was a story with an X as a matter of fact, so I still share the story. I've decided I still want to do that. But technically, it's a vulnerable story about me being scared, right? jumping out of an airplane, right? So vulnerability doesn't just have to be about the tragedy or intimate moments, you have to decide what moments you want to share what personal moments in your life you want to share. There are many personal moments that happened. But then you tie it back to what I said earlier, which is the story and the lesson. So you decide by just like you said, process of elimination, let's first start with what I don't want to share, right? And hopefully you don't, he wrote everything from like, you don't want to write you decide what you want to share how you want to share it, and and then you create your stories from that bit process. So
41:06
do you. You talk about this as a story I tell. So you have, like intentional stories in different buckets? Sure, it's very intentional about having those specific. And that's not like they're canned answers. They're just very specific. Well thought out. Here's the story. And here's the lesson.
41:32
Yeah. In the same way that in the same way that when you go to the bank, which I guess many of us don't anymore, but if you go to the bank to deposit money, you can only withdraw the money that you've deposited. Right. And so yes, I've taken a lot of time over the years to work on the stories that I have, or moments that have happened in my life, I have something called a story bank journal that started as me just handwriting stories. At the end of the day, I would take five minutes and think about what happened today, that might be a good story to share. And the way that I do that is I start with, I try to give it a title, some kind of title. So like, let's just take the skydiving story, I might just say skydiving for 30th birthday. And then I'll talk about what happened. It doesn't have to be the full drawn out story, just bullet notes. And then I think of what are the different lessons for this bullet note for the for this story. The lessons now there's multiple, there isn't always one, there's multiple that that you can decide, oh, I might share it this way. I might share that way. But what happens is, I may not use that story. Like I know there's one story I haven't used in years. But it's in my rolodex now. It's in my bank.
42:40
Right? Right. It's like fabrics for a designer. Yeah, we know what's available. We know where to go pull from when you're looking for something specific.
42:49
Exactly. And so you have taken the time to think about what lessons do I want to share what has happened? Here's a really good thing is like you think about what if something bad that might have happened with a client interaction, maybe client did something that you didn't, they didn't You didn't want them to do? Or maybe they weren't following any directions at all. When you go to talk to them, you could tell them, you could say, Hey, you're not following the directions. Or you could tell them a story about another client who didn't follow directions, and how that project went awry. Right, so that they can see themselves in the story.
43:25
Right? Which you make them the hero? Exactly.
43:31
You make them the hero and no hero wants to fail.
43:33
Right. And it's not about you the designer. It's about the client. Yes, yes.
43:40
And so I've taken time for sure. Is I know you mentioned how like I'm really good at it. It's comes through practice it. Ironically, the story I told you about Mrs. Dolly, my TV production teacher, that's a story. I didn't tell the first five years of my business, because I just didn't think it mattered. I didn't think anyone would care about it. But I realized the more I shared that story, people would lean in and they'd wait. Your teacher gave you business cards, right? Teachers don't do that. And I realized people were more interested in the story than they were in us doing the work. They realized what they took away from that is not only she gave me business cards, but then I had the courage to continue. Right? Because at 17 Starting a business like 17 year olds don't do that. Wasn't
44:26
Yeah, I was a little shit when I was 17.
44:31
Right. And so so you have taken time over the years to they're not canned. I just get the opportunity as I'm talking to someone, oh, this might help them. So let me tell them that
44:41
story, right. Yeah, no, it makes sense. Because I can see where I do something similar. It's like, I hear myself over and over but it's never the same delivery. Never. Yeah, ever. Yeah. It's just like a comedian going on stage. It's similar but yeah, so Okay. So what is the cost of Of like, not telling, not telling stories. So, you know, our listeners today might be like, Oh, I'm not good at that. I'm not going to do it. I know that doesn't make sense or whatever story you see, you're telling yourself a story. You see what I did there, dude, you're telling yourself a story about telling stories. But what's the cost from a like, I guess a business standpoint.
45:25
The cost is frustration and failure.
45:28
Frustration. That's, that's kind of harsh dude. Kind of like, like the five pages of you're gonna die, you're gonna die?
45:37
Well, it's, it's the reality that we we spend a lot of time knowing what we want from our business or knowing, let's say, hypothetically, you want freedom, you want more money, than not doing the things that you know are necessary to get fit, not showing up fully. Right, hiding from the fact that oh, this might be too hard. 2011 I woke up at 7am to the sounds of chains hitting the floor, and it always been a nightmare for me to hear these chains hitting the floor. Well, Michelle, when I jumped up out of bed, I looked at the front window and what it was was a tow truck driver coming to repossess my car for the second time in eight months. I went back in my room, sat on the edge of the bed, my head in my hands, and I'm thinking to myself, alright, I at this point, I'm in business for five years, I've given it a good five year run. Maybe this isn't what I was meant to do. And as I'm sitting in that soup of anxiety for about 40 minutes, I get a call from a client Keisha, you're in Keisha told you about was she was selling cosmetics she was doing she was selling colored lipstick, so like pink, purple, blue, green. These were colors that weren't popular back then. And she's like, Judy, Judy, you won't believe you won't believe it. I'm like, what happened? Keisha. She was like, I just got off the phone with my account. And that made a million dollars. Now, I've already told you that Keisha made a million dollars. And I told you like, for me, that is what helps me get into this industry of documentaries for entrepreneurs. But the reason that it it helps me get into that industry is because I realize why did Keisha make a million dollars? It wasn't simply just because of documentary. The documentary helped Keisha Keisha was relentless and telling her story over and over, and over and over again, no matter who heard it already, she would tell it again. And I realized I wasn't telling any of my stories, although I was helping clients tell stories. I wasn't, Oh, my story's
47:48
interesting, right?
47:50
We often know what to do, we just don't do it ourselves. And that's why I say it's frustration and failure. Because when you know, you have good stories and you wish every person if you're living and breathing, you have good stories and you if you know you have good stories in you, it is incumbent upon you to tell those stories. Like it's imperative, it's not an option. In 2024 and 2024. As we record this, it is no longer an option whether or not you tell stories, right? It's just not because it is those stories that help to differentiate you from any other interior designer, because every interior designer at this point who's on Instagram is sharing the final design. They're sharing the picture of the beautiful home. But when a client looks at that they can't tell the difference between Michel interior design, Michel design, or do Charles interior design, they can't tell the difference. What what helps them make the decision of why you Why should I do business with Michel Lind versus any and every other option available? It is the stories, the stories are the one thing that no one else can duplicate from you.
48:58
I'm gonna go get your book because it is so hard. So. So this is not a commercial for Jude's book. But y'all. I mean, if you're listening, isn't it hard to find? Like what's unique about you because we just live with it. It's like it's it's like, as clear as the home in front of me. It's just there. So it's there's nothing special about it. So having the tool to extract it. I had a really good experience when I was creating this designed for the creative mind platform. And as I was launching the interior design business bakery, I had a brilliant copywriter Julie Cubasis, she was on the podcast, gosh, I don't even know what it was, but I'll link that in the notes. But she extracted content from me that and then she turns it around and it's like oh wow, I am kind of cool. But to do it for ourselves is hard. Yeah. If
50:00
it's hard, only if you're not willing to slow down and spend the time to ask yourself the questions, one of the most important questions you should ask yourself is why? And you should ask yourself, why five times? So hypothetically, let's just say my daughter,
50:15
Jude, I got my five and a half year old asked me why Mom, why Mom, why mom? Now you're asking me to do the same thing?
50:21
Yeah, so hypothetically, let's say like, one thing I hear from interior designs, interior designers often is, we're passionate about helping people or we care about helping people worry where you go above and beyond for our clients. Well, why? Why does that matter to you? And then you're gonna give me a response. Okay, but why? I overtime have learned my purpose and mission is to lead and empower entrepreneurs to have relentless courage. That why comes from the 17 year old kid who had to have the courage to start a business when no one in his family supported him starting a business. Right. And it's the same courage that entrepreneurs need to have today to say the thing that they most want to say, but are too afraid to say, right. Right. But that question, how I came to that conclusion came from why. And I've refined my why over time. But it came from why it came from continuously asking myself that slowing down in those two months to think about, why do I do things the way that I do them? Right? And who am I because of that? Yeah, it's it's, it's so, so necessary to ask yourself these questions is so necessary to slow down. Because without it, you won't be able to find the stories, the stories of you whether it was me as a 17 year old, or even as an eight year old writing 100 page books. Like, why was I doing that? Right? Right. Like, when someone asks me, who are you? Like, let's just say hypothetically, as I do these interviews, and someone axes me will tell you tell people who you are. I always start with, I am a curious young kid, the same curious young kid at eight years old writing 100 page books, because today that is the same reason why I'm really good at video production and really good at telling stories is because I just asked really great questions. I know that's my superpower. The reason you can see Luann the way that you see her in her documentary is because I've asked her really hard questions that she was willing to answer and be vulnerable about.
52:25
Right? Well, ask better questions, you get better answers. Exactly as crappy questions, you get crappy answers.
52:31
Yep. Yep. And so that is, but that was the eight year old kid who was curious enough to ask those questions. Because I was writing 100 page books about what I thought my future life would look like. Which I would need to ask myself, okay, what would that look like? If I became a police officer? I wrote a book called the police life of Jude Charles. What if I became a baseball player? I wrote the baseball life of Jude Charles like, and all I wrote 11 books, but all of it was about asking myself, what if? What could life look like? I've always been dreaming. And so yeah, it's the quality of the questions that you ask yourself. But it's possible, it's possible to do it, it's possible to find those stories. Those stories are hidden within you. But it's possible to find them and to be able to share them, share them authentically. I
53:17
love that and give ourselves permission to not do it perfectly. Because our stories are imperfect.
53:23
Absolutely. So this stories, I've shared that but never landed. It they fell flat. And it was like okay, maybe that wasn't a good story. But I love
53:33
$56 million budget like some movies.
53:38
And so I love that you said that is like you give yourself permission to you know, that didn't work out. Comedians go through you mentioned comedians, comedians go through that to where they will do their their stand up at a very small Comedy Club, right? small venue to test it out before they go do their performance at Madison Square Garden. Right? Because there's certain things it's just not gonna land,
54:01
but or the timing is off or whatever. Right.
54:05
But you learn the skill over time you see how people respond to it. You see how your clients respond to it. You see how effective it is? And you're like, Okay, I'm going to keep using that one, because that worked out really well. Right. And so, yeah, it's imperative, interesting. It's imperative as necessary. The reason that I like to do storytelling in all different formats, is because it helps me refine my stories to the story about the Tesla car on top of another car is one that I tell on podcasts. I've shared it on Instagram, trying to think where else share it when I'm speaking, right? Because I'm refining it each and every time and I'm looking at okay, what works, what doesn't work. There's certain pauses that I take that are important to the story, whereas, you know, so it's always a refinement. I like to do an insert in different avenues, but I think it helps to You continue to market and promote who you are and what you stand for. I
55:04
love the fact that you're so intentional about it because as I hear you, I'm like, Okay, I do that, okay, I kind of do that. It's all a lot of it's just instinct, this is just human nature is to tell stories. And also, and I want to be respectful of your time and of our listeners time as well. But stories are how history was told before there was the ability to write anything. So I, I believe that storytelling is in our, you know, in our cells at a cellular level, kind of who we are.
55:35
Absolutely, it is who we are. It's who we are as human, it's how we connect. So the way you make friends, is through the stories of the experiences that you've had in life. Whether that was in school, middle school, high school, or even in college. That's how you made friends. In work relationships, like I know, there's a lot of people that have designed besties it is through the stories of how you got to where you are that has led to your design. bestie. Like I believe Heather and Ivan are design besties.
56:08
Yes, they were on the podcast together not so long ago, and just hearing their story. It's hilarious. But yeah,
56:16
how are you doing? Fine. Yes, kindred spirits. But those kindred spirits comes from sharing the moments in our lives that are in common. Storytelling is the one skill that has stood the test of time, whether it is for marketing, for sales for connection. You're talking about a 2000 plus year old skill that has helped us form as human beings. The reason for Michelle lend today is because of the stories that your parents told you. True. And I think we talked about this off camera, even your daughter how she Yeah.
56:59
She's a little sponge. Gotta be careful what? Yeah, goes in comes out.
57:04
Yeah. Right. So yeah, storytelling is just so incredibly powerful. And that's why I say it's no longer an option. It is imperative to tell stories to share your stories, it doesn't always have to be your personal story. It can be your client stories, as well, right. And so it's imperative to share those stories and to allow people to see a glimpse into your world.
57:26
I love that. And I know that our listeners, we probably could just pause and record a whole second episode. But dude, will you now that now that I'm gonna release the information, tell them tell the audience how they can connect with you?
57:43
Yeah, so first and foremost is through my website, ju Charles that CO you can connect through the through me there and find my contact information as well if you would like to work together, but the other place that I share, I guess we can call it wisdom. I'll put it on that pedestal is through Instagram instagram.com forward slash ju Charles my, my handle is Jude Charles on my first and last name. But that's where I share the content and the stories that Michelle was talking about that she's seen. That's why I share those stories is true, Charles, this Instagram handle is true, Charles,
58:19
I love that. And you're Yeah, just all your platforms are so top notch. It's just like they're reflective of you. So I will make sure that all of those details are listed in the show notes for the audience to reference. So if y'all are driving, you don't need to scramble run anybody over, you can just refer back to it a little bit. And for those of y'all who are looking for a little bite of the interior design business bakery, check out designed for the creative mind and go to the coaching section we have recently rolled out a membership is called Sugar and spice and it is less than 50 bucks a month. calorie free. And it'll just give you a taste of getting involved in in our community of if you're not quite ready for the interior design business bakery, we've got something for you. So head on over designed for the creative mind.com And then coaching and it's called the society. So join us there. And y'all choose to be great today. And every day. And thank you again, dude for being here.
59:28
So thank you for having me.
59:30
Hey, y'all. If you love the show and find it useful, I would really appreciate it if you would share with your friends and followers. And if you like what you're hearing, want to put a face with the name and get even more business advice. Then join me in my Facebook group. The interior designers business Launchpad. Yeah, I know it's Facebook, but just come on in for the training and then leave without scrolling your feet. It's fine. I promise you'll enjoy it. And finally, I hear it's good for business. To get ratings on your podcast, so please drop yours on whatever platform you use to listen to this. We're all about community over competition. So let's work on elevating our industry, one designer at a time. See you next time.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
